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old_letters_i_wrote
bethany Hey Nathanny,

Life is good over in America. I’m getting the grades I want at school and I just got a kick-ass job babysitting. You know the typical life of a student. The students here are preforming a play I wrote. It’s a one-act entitledWhere Would We Walkand I can’t wait until I can see it played out. I’m a little nervous to show it to so many people but, I am going to school for writing so I should get used to it. Casting is tomorrow night, rehearsals start the week after and the show is in early April. I’ll send you a tape of the show.
I just got two new jobs, one at a bakery and one babysitting. The bakery is beautiful and just by the train tracks; it called the Whistle Stop Bakery and is owned by a woman named Lollie. I couldn’t make up a better children’s show than this place. My job is baking so I have to be there at 3 am until 7 am, and then I go to class. It’s fucked up but it works. The babysitting job is through a Montessori school and I haven’t even met my boss. It’s a referral deal so I get $9 an hour because I’m all checked out, I even had to get a police record. I get a call from the school with an address, and when the night’s over I get paid cash. Sorry to bore you with the details but it’s the best job ever. All the parents that do this are really into their kids, and they’re usually really young kids, so there are all kinds of toys to play with.
Friends are good, lot’s of new ones this semester which I’m not too keen on. None of the romantic nature, and you’d understand why if you came here. Cafeteria food sucks as usual. I just never eat at school anymore, usually I steal something from either workplace, works out healthier.
I’m all recovered from my circus-protesting massacre. I got my picture in the school’s paper, but I don’t think I even saved a copy. It was good though; I had a really good excuse to be lazy, and got out of swimming. For the 5 hours of lifeguarding I do at the pool here I have to swim and since I was all sick and bruised and shit my bosses didn’t make me do the swims for about a month.
You care.

miss ya bunches anyhow
bethany
021021
...
ItGirl Hello Timothy,

It's been awhile... the last time I saw you was the night we watched Resevoir Dogs. You remember that night don't you, Timmie? Do you remember what you said then... how you needed some time, but we would someday watch a movie together again? I didn't write to talk about that though. I wrote because I wanted to remember you, "and stuff". The introduction to "The Best Friends Boyfriend"... always an interesting affair. That's all you were supposed to be. But we have a certain chemistry, as innate as it is inexplicable. And while it ended badly I wanted to think of all the good times. Creative writing... I had a crush on you then... That poem you wrote about it all not being so bad... well I don't even remember the words now, but it was beautiful. And after you guys broke up... then school was over. Cut to next year, junior year, I remember skipping study hall to wander the building. You showed me "your" stage. The catwalks, "the chunnel" We got locked in the stairway in the old building. Then Senior Year... science and social studies the two period laugh-a-thon. "That girl" thought we were funny anyway. Remember how I always forgot to put my name on the papers? Will I still be It Girl now? I stole your duct tape and you called me a slut. "Suck my cock, bitch" haha... I thought it was so funny then. Just a giant joke. You were my best friend. Now you're just another person I can't talk to. Yeah I do miss you... how could I not? I cried you know... when you told me you needed some time. So I'm alone now... i thought you might appreciate the irony. And so for the sake of irony... tell me it will be ok?

It's been real...

~It Girl
030714
...
ferret a message for adrienne

"i tried so hard to be her day
but the night has already taken me away
shedding dreams under the maple tree
where i carbed your name
nothing left, not even time
straight reads the line
his life had reached the end
wanting only to be loved by adrienne
letters explained his grief
but she would never read
his wrists would bleed
but she would never see
so he took his life at the age of 23
and she had always loved him
but he would never know
for she covered her love
like stars cover the sky
hiding her heart
fearing what he would find inside
years took her away
a widow she remained
holding him deep inside
wishing she too would die
time favors no one and if we wait
we too can fall in love
a second too late"

-underoath

i love that song
030714