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not_a_nice_person
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elimeny
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where these things come from
these feelings, this apathy, these nightmares...
there is no source, they just visit me from time to time
everything fades and runs away from me. whatever it is i want i cannot capture
whatever it is i need is no longer in my peripheral vision.
im cold, and im desolate.
and you will tell me i boil over with warmth, that i live in such a lively manner, that i laugh with great emphasis on every joy there is.
but you do not know me.
because i hide from you.
did you know that you bore me?
did you know that i actually don't want to talk to you?
when the apathy sets in (and inevitably it will), where do you want to be?
because you wont be with me.
because even if i want to want you, the feelings will escape me.
i leave a trail of blood wherever i go.
and thats why i dont want you to see me fall apart, thats why i am proud.
if people knew the bloodletting i participate in, they wouldnt come to me.
so i masquerade my seizures.
so dont ask me why i wont let you in.
you do not know me.
i am not a nice person.
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030125
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Alden
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You want to be a nice person, and you know it. We all have our own demons we must face, and just because you hide yourself away inside doesn't mean that noone will ever find you. There are those who won't be afraid of the truth, and you can't run forever. I have seen the beauty that is you, and the darkness lurking underneath, but which will emerge victorius in the end?
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030125
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elimeny
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not about you
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030126
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minnesota_chris
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stop being a wiener, alden.
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030127
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Bloody Trail
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finding someone boring doesnt mean you arent a nice person...I myself find most people boring...the only one I really find fascinating is beyond me...but not because she isnt nice...
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030804
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misstree
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because i have deliberately caused pain to others and enjoyed it.
many times.
and i'll do it again.
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030804
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ashmanzhou
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trying to find out what we hide inside
not me
not nice
do we find the silver platter hidden
behind thou placid spine
or doth thou not find
a problem
another tamper'd hellish dream
which thouest must relive
again and again in thou mind
i doubst thee is a placid soule
thou my self soule doth severe find
in my own mind of shail'd hate
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030804
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elimeny
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i wanted to be... i always want to be the sweet girl... and i wish i could control my feelings, but all i can control are my actions. and i try to be gentle. i think i should just stop looking for someone, because all i do is hurt other people. it makes me think someone should just kill me off, im a flaw in the universe, because all i do is hurt people.
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030904
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The Spork
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Here! Present and accounted for.
Phhhbtbtbtbtbtb!
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030904
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