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makeda
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i came out the
bathroom earlier and this woman i know in passing from
the human resources dept was in there crying now this
was a very awkward situation for me for some reason
cause you realize that the lady probably wants to be
alone but damn i had to pee really bad i was feeling
pretty annie wilkeish this morning and i didnt want to
take the chance of snapping on somebody or bursting
into tears at some random moment so i took one of
those xanax and washed it down with bout 32oz of water
i was really thristy for some reason, yeah that brings
me to another thought about how fucking hypocritical
this society is when it comes to drugs why is it ok to
deal with depression/anxiety by popping a little pill
that has all these potential weird side effects like
memory loss hallucinations confusion etc but on the
flipside its illegal to smoke weed which helps you
cope with the same shit but has little to no effect on
you physiologically although there is that little
thing called cancer but hell you would have to smoke a
hell of alot and for years and years to develop that i
think, so i'm in the bathroom with her and have a
split second to decide if im going to leave and let
her be alone or if im going do what i came to do
needless to say my bladder won that argument why didnt
she go into a stall sit on the toilet and sob quietly
to herself like all the rest of us normally do thats
what i was wondering as the sounds of her sobs were
intermingling with my urination i wonder what she was
crying about though not that i really care i'm jsut
curious i guess ill stop invading your thoughts and
find something else to do dont ask me what cause it
damn sure wont be work although if i tried to
concentrate onthat it may burn some of this unfocused
energy i have right now and keep my mind off other
things, i really miss joshua today and i feel really
lonely i guess i should take his name off my email
address list
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030620
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