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a clever disguise
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I lost respect for him when he left his wife and kids. In my heart I knew it was wrong, and though I loved him, it was a contradiction to who I thought he was.
His decision still haunts me to this day. After all the back and forth, I told him we needed to grow up and he needed to stay where he was, but he wouldn't listen.
I am somewhat responsible and I know that, which is why I have so much guilt. But in the end, it was his decision, and he never should have made it.
As someone who values the institution of marriage and has seen her parents stick it out for 35 years and counting, I should have known that it was not the right path for us.
I remember telling him when it first started, "Someday, when you two are celebrating your 50th anniversary together, you won't even remember me."
And that's how I wished it would go. Honestly.
But when he left her forever, what was I supposed to do? Turn my back on him? With all my guilt and knowing how I felt about him, I just couldn't.
But I should have.
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