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deb
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so many thoughts
don't know where to begin
things here are so
different
than i thought they might be
at this point...
married,
1 kid,
another on the way
some days i wonder what might have happened
if
i had done things another way
if i had said something
when i had the chance
if i would be here right now
if i hadn't done this or that...
all the questions burning
in the back of my mind
as i sit here
depressing myself with music
but really,
even IF
things would be different
had i taken a different turn
back then...
would i want to change all this?
would i want to give up this life?
that beautiful blonde child asleep...
the little one kicking away in his
custom-made coccoon....
this glittering thing upon my finger
and the man it links me to forever?
no...
no, i don't think i would change a thing.
i couldn't imagine my life
without him..
without that little girl...
without the future that i know is ahead
its just been a long day
i guess
sunlight peering through miniblinds
giving me a headache
all the ifs
all the maybes
but none of them ARE.
none of them were MEANT to be, apparently
and i'm sure i'm better off
not ever having the opportunity to know
and still... it just makes you wonder...
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040824
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