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to_an_end
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birdmad
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if the news i'm going to hear tomorrow is any indication, i may finally be able to lay my fear of the month of February to rest.
For once the thing i am about to hear is, by all the indications good news related to my job
fuck knows that since roughly the age of 16 i have not walked away from that month without wishing i could forget some large chunk of it
for once, it seems i won't be getting dumped, fired, dumped, cheated on and dumped, beaten to a bloody pulp, robbed, dunped, sleeping in a park, losing a grandparent, having to spend half a paycheck on plumbing problems, having to commit or cover up a crime, getting psychoanalyzed by a hack, or trying to account for a weekend i can't remember from being so strung out.
and i say it's about goddamn time
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040204
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grendel
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either that or i am about to become the but of some cruel version of a real-life "geico commercial"
i'll admit, my optimism is guarded, but it's there
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040204
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bird
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10% raise, reclassified to a slightly higher position
effective monday
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040205
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Death of a Rose
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perfect!
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040205
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birdmad
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and as if to take just a little bit of the wind out of my sails, the bus ride home was spent sitting next to a fairly cute, talkative recovering(? so she said but i wasn't so sure) speed-freak who, except for the darker hair color and being a bit thinner, looked an unsettling lot like one of the characters behind one of those events that have led me to dislike February... everything about the face, the voice and a lot of her personality and mannerisms seemed like an exact match.
she had been a hardcore tweaker too once, before i met her.
when soneone else got on needing a seat, i excused myself and got up to stand toward the back door...not missing a beat, she began chatting merrily away to the old woman who i gave up the seat for who smiled and nodded politely.
Hah.
years go by and something manages to pull her back to the surface of my memory just when i managed to go awhile without her even crossing the synapses in the furthest back corners of my head.
i feel stupid sometimes that i can't manage to just shut that door to that avenue of the_persistence_of_memory and seal it away and forget her once and for all
i've never been good at getting the fuck over it
today was a good day, but after all, what's a silver lining without the pre-requisite cloud?
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040205
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birdmad
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A Means...
(joy_division)
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040206
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Death Agrees
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I know what you mean Mr. Birdmad.
.
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040208
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