|
rhin
|
it is so easy for me to barricade myself away from the rest of the world - away from the things that hurt me.
even on a beautiful, sunny day i have to make myself venture out into the Hurtland.
is this the way to live? obviously it is a safe way to live, but mentally it is not ideal. it's not really living. so, what's the point.
so easy to escape into my books, my writing, my music, my thoughts, my world. my own little insignificant life. but, away from the things that hurt me.
i can talk to you here and feel safe. yes, words can hurt me, but i can more easily shut them out. the you in the physical sense is not so easy. i lose my ground when faced with your physical expression...frightening me and challenging my sense of balance.
all of these walls that i have built ever so carefully are not meant to keep you out, but are in fact meant to keep me in...an absolute act of self-destruction.
i just need to find someone with a fucking bulldozer i guess.
|
130527
|
