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blah-ze
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it hurt, silly people saying stupid things while you sit with tears it the corners of your eyes and wait for the pain to go away
it hurt, falling all the way down from what your parents built you up to be: the special treatment doesnt apply here
but even if they cant appreciate me as a person, they can appreciate me as an attractive slab of meat: i didn't eat today... another step toward that killer body, my stomach twist in on itself all through my shift, drinking water couldn't fool it
i cant sleep again, things i dont know closing in around me, being seperated hurts, but the thought of what she is thinking of me tears at me
ive done nothing except sit and bleed out slowly
shes been avoiding me, her phone is off, she never answers my messages, all i want is to hear her voice and shes gone: the pain floods in
my shoulders burn and stomach pounds from the cruches and lifts and push-ups i did today: two weeks and im still ugly and fat
i dont want to be me anymore i just want to go away
everything is too painful here
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060129
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