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re_alisma
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an "issue 38" is, of course, tempting. a crooked, crooked finger finally urging me to come over. but i think everybody, and especially God, knows i wouldn't be invited to the money cocktail party. apparently the first issue, fall 1998, has something to do with a ski instructor. it always seems to me that skiing requires money, or an attitude of money, or something. but maybe it is: who can afford to get stuck in that whole thing? and entanglement procedure, to be sure (and i'm no physicist).
i am, of course, going to stay-the-course, and continue to ignore the whole McSweeney's phenom., as it makes me feel about as big as an ant in a landscape painting.
It's just too big. I really can handle Wallace because I have the background for Wallace. McSweeney's is a big party that i need a buddy to guide me through and hide behind. And I'm sure everybody would be assuring me that everything was on ground-all-the-solider, but my defenses say that it's simply a minor vignette of the big whale, in the desert of the ocean, come to swallow its lunch of a single guppy. pathetic.
Cocktail parties are truly the epitome of people talking too fast and leaving my lecture-attuned self in the dust. I understand myself well enough; these people look, well, confusing.
at any rate, i managed to ignore it until today when i seriously considered purchasing an issue, but I'd have to go to the city, or coldly internet-purchase/doorstep-it, which doesn't seem quite right either. is this sad? this feels sad. maybe, then, it's just par for the territory.
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110901
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