blather
self_improvement
smurfus rex [Jack points at the Guess ad]

"Is that what a real man looks like?"

[Tyler looks, then grins]

"Self improvement is masturbation. Now, self destruction..."

[Both consider] 		031203
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her royal highness the quirk today somebody who is very close to me told me that i have a perpetual scowl that makes me unapproachable.

i've always known that i don't have the friendliest demeaner, and i've actually been quite proud of it. i've considered it to be the one of the things about me that falls completely under the category of bitch.

but somehow somebody saying that out loud to me made me feel violated, like somebody was watching me get dressed from a window across the street. i suddenly feel like my defense that keeps strangers away from me has been exposed to the world.

at the same time, i feel like maybe my defense hasn't worked as well as i thought. clearly there are people who have barged in past my scowl. i mean, all the people who i consider friends recognize that there's more to me than messed up hair, baggy clothes, and rude facial expressions. my mother thinks i'm sweet and intelligent, and definitely approachable.

so maybe all this means that i just don't like to let new people into my life. maybe it means that every time a new person has come in, they've just fucked up my world. maybe i should unlearn this. maybe i should realize that not everybody is out to get me. maybe i should stop thinking about it and smile once in a while. *smiles* :-) 		040216
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june no, you have to have perfect teeth 040216
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Death of a Rose As of a week ago, I started on this self improvement thing. So what if its masturbation, hell, that's fun up to a point.

I've set goals, goals that should have been there a long time ago. No woman will ever touch my heart again. None, for I will not offer it to them. I've returned to lifting weights and I am contemplating after a few weeks have gone by, to returning to Tae Kwon Do classes. I've promised myself that by the summer three things will have happened:

1. Motorcyle for me.
2. Tribalistic tattoo for the back of me.
3. Blathercon 2004.

After that we'll see. 		040217
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minnesota_chris 1. not an improvement
2. not an improvement
3. fun, but not an improvement 		040410
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Doar you know what MC, I was all ready to react badly to your post, but I realize your values are different then mine. all three are improvements to me. 040820
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shivers im satisfied being the sorry excuse for a human being that i am.
no, not really. but im to lazy and undetirmined lets say, to do anything about it. 		040821
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pete degineration, or atleast my right thumb, it doesn't so much bleed as it takes deep cuts 040821
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minnesota_chris hey man, it's not like I don't want a motorcycle (all three things actually) too, but I just don't see how it improves me. How does it improve you? 040821
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minnesota_chris oh, and good response, you're wise. 040821
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Death of a Rose If the above can be considers a reinforcement of purpose and enjoyment, well I consider that an improvement. That in itself is an improvement for the self/ego.

I still feel bad about the blathercon deal though I did have daffy's words to ring some chimes in the ole head. Besides he didn't even go, as well as many others. Not their faults nor is it mine. I just feel bad about Mr. Reality doing all that work for nothing, although it might prepare him for next time. If he might read this, he can pop himself on a bus and come up to BC and enjoy some relaxation time. Anyways, I'm taking up far too much of blather space with this response. 		040821
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Doar "considers = considered" 040821
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minnesota_chris "reinforcement of purpose and enjoyment, well I consider that an improvement."

equals "do what you want?" That would be a good thing for a good person, but a bad thing for a bad person, wouldn't it? Isn't it a bad thing for bad people (and I know that misstree is going to set me on fire for this one) isn't it a bad thing for bad people to indulge themselves? 		040829
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daxle plastic surgery 040829
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daxle change comes from within 040829
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uow hmm

1.) i need to lose the weight i've gained over the past year or so. it's funny how weight has to be the first thing i write about. i'm just feeling too fat. i hate feeling fat.

2.) i should cut my hair. i really should. it's too damn long. i like having my hair long, but it's too long. i'm going to trim it some.

3.) i need a telephone of my own. i haven't had my own phone in ten years. being phoneless sucks.

4.) i could travel. i could learn how to drive maybe. or i could hitchhike everywhere.


all of these things might help me feel better. i need to stop hating myself. 		040923
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monee i'm slowing losing weight
someday i will be happy with my weight again.


i did cut my hair, about ten inches. it's still too long. i'm going to cut it some more.


i'll get a phone when i get a place.


i'll travel when the snow melts. i'll be back when the flowers spring. 		041217
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monee *slowly, not slowing, unless my metabolism is. 041217
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missionary The Bible is the original Self Improvement book. Today, most self_help "gurus" basically regurgitate biblical principles. The major change is a simple omission of any references to God.

Unfortunately, most of the "issues" that we are plagued with, that we want to change, are spiritually based. Their simple principles, while true, lack the Supernatural Power needed to effect any lasting changes. 		041217
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sameolme I read the bible for self improvement
and learned to force people to prove their love for me.
Just as god told Abraham to kill his own son, I now ask potential dates to murder one of their family members to show that they're ready to "go all the way". 		041217
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nom my hair grew back
i think i should cut it again


i have a phone now


i'm going to vancouver soon 		060208
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used karma salesman change comes from within, eh?

whatever.

i'll tell the cops that the next time i get arrested for trying to shit in an automatic toolbooth 		060208
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daxle change comes from sarcasm and denial 060208
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kiang shi sarcasm is the consequence of platitudes 060208
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daxle sarcasm is a personal choice, whether the sarcastic person wants to take responsibility for their actions or not 060208
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nom i've been thinking about what i wrote about my weight


i'm trying not to be too hard on myself 		060208
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nom i'm trying not to be too hard on myself 070123
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