blather
really_sad
u24 I used to be wide eyed with possibilities and now.... it’s just hard to muster that enthusiasm and self belief any more. 200824
...
unhinged .



(like depressives do, i am isolating myself)
200827
...
IGG It feels sometimes like the real, mundane world has wormed its way inside, draining the life and passion from your soul and making your dreams tired. Like when the lights come up at the end of a wild, magical night at a club and you see the unicorns are just sweaty people with too-wide eyes and melted makeup, and the mystery and excitement is gone. The bright lights make everything flat and dull and there is a sense that you were a fool to believe things could be magical and exciting.

I find it difficult too, especially this year. You are not alone and I think it just takes a bit of a change to help you realise that the dreams and ideas are not dead. You are not starting out again from scratch but simply starting a new chapter with all of the experience you've gained. There is something that will spark you again, just find the change you need.

Sending love to you lovely blatherskites.
201105
...
unhinged i watched the city that shaped my early adolescence die at the hands of billionaire capitalism


but radical lingering roots of this place (not from the 1990s but the 1890s!!!) have me a taste for something besides flannel shirts doc_martens and guitar feedback


i know the power of unions
and picket lines
and anarchists clashing with cops
the power of women before we could vote
(the free speech fights of the wwi era)


i sprouted my karmic seeds of radical discontent in the place that killed kurt...my_middle_name_is_faith means something different now.


such is life
i have always mourned the passing of the old
but decades of loss
have taught me to find the beauty
of what comes after the rain

(how easy the smile is twisted to tears
but
the_goddess_speaks
and the more i listen
i find the reverse to
also be true

tears can turn to smiles
if i
let_them)
201106