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gull
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i’ll sit up all night for you
and you’ve done the same for me.
we do it because we want to.
you don’t seem to understand
that i really want to be with you
and that i can't bear to leave you
because i hate saying goodbye.
i’d stay until the end of time
if my head didn’t shut down.
hear me curse when my mind is tired,
when it's mute and crying for sleep.
feel the rage when my brain can’t function
and my thoughtless fingers
say the wrong thing, time and time again.
oh, how it puts everything we built
on this senseless foundation of egg shells.
everything we built out of nothing,
just our dreams and our desire.
you’re tired too. you were then,
you are now. right this instance.
maybe not in the physical sense,
but i see the bags under your eyes.
i probably put them there.
don’t leave unless the reason is right.
please don’t walk away and hide.
i cry when you won’t come out to play.
who have i got to play with now?
i’m kicking my heels, scuffing my toes
and holding my head in my hands.
you should see me, what you do to me.
i’ll be here at five o’clock, five in the morning.
maybe i’ll be tired, but only of the
waiting and wondering and worrying.
yes, i’ll be waiting for you, dear.
i’ll be in our special place at five.
please come to me and make it better.
take away the pain and make it all right.
wipe away the tears, the tears i can’t cry,
and pick up the crumbs of our disagreement.
they’re scattered all over the floor.
you can obliterate a few tactless expressions
if you take the time. maybe. i think so.
you could try, at least, i guess.
what have you got to lose?
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020328
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