blather
lost_you
bethany i'll cry
when you answer me
and you come back from your night of cinderelladom and
i
have already realised
you have been lost
to your indiana jones
020507
...
HiddenFaith forget faces, without any traces,
what's left of last summer.
bitter smiles to clod shoulder's.
this hallway has never seemed so long since you won't notice the; (bags under my eyes, slump in my walk, screams begging you to turn around and face me) face me and tell me what went wrong with our big plans of desert islands and long sunsets. face me.
tell me what i didn't give. i dare you
020508
...
hide in faith forgo race and, with so many paces,
what's left of Fort Sumner.
battered styles to cloud's thunder.
this stall may have never seemed so long since you won't notice the; (bags under my bed, sunk in my stalk, screens egging you to spurn a round-eyed face cream) raze me and tell me what went wrong with our big plants on desert eye lands and long son sex. mace me.
tell me what i didn't give. i care, you
020917
...
unhinged somewhere between the 'i want to' and 'be with you' part or the 'you make me' and 'happy' part because you won't believe a word of it. i'm just settling for less...i don't think so. no one has ever given me that much. but i can barely keep myself on track let alone someone else. i have time but i don't know if i have patience. we have distance but i don't know if we have fortitude. i don't want to lose you but i don't know if i can hold on to you. 020917
...
unhinged you are married now. it's too late to say all the words left unspoken. maybe it wouldn't matter. we have crisscrossed thousands of miles between us, but still your grey were like a magnet the last time i saw you. in the interim, you found a woman to marry. surreal is not a word i think you should use to describe marriage, but it makes sense coming from you. i'm sure it's something you never thought you would do. the visa was expiring, you weren't ready to let go. go to the courthouse. keep it on a roll. go to her penthouse. keep it all.


the past doesn't make a difference now. i don't send you pictures anymore. your wife might not like our past touching your(s) future.
150708