blather
just_one_of_those_days
milo [just one of those days]

it’s just one of those days when time seems to be
running
particularly slow.
when i just wish i
was somewhere else.
not here.
or bullet proof
so to stand the attacks
here.

maybe it’s the apathy
that has multiplied through
the lonely years gone by
or maybe it’s just that seeing
clearly has
made me mad.
...
050316
...
the KID when the cat ruins your barbeque 050316
...
unhinged where the pressure from every possible angle
makes me want to curl up in a ball
and die
050316
...
nineteen The air is just air,
a cigarette to a bum,
a new book to read,
doing my job,
and coughing up my macaroni.
051226
...
j don't take it personal 051227
...
Piso Mojado knitting a hat
taking a nap
eating alone
still in pajamas
051227
...
sirflaccid It is one of those days that you wait for. A chance to purge myself of thoughts that creep around here.

Sadly, I don't know where to begin. I do not know what to say. I cannot put the words together. Oh god, why does this happen? I want to, but I can't. What is this trap? No one understands anyway. Why go to the trouble?

I'll just curl up in bed.
051228
...
who i am doesnt matter anymore yep its just one of those days when i wish i would have drove my car off to the side of the road and crashed real bad. or drank myself crazy and passed out. or told anyone that pissed me off fuck you. or could have sceamed and cried a billion times but didnt let myself. im so sick and tired of keeping it together, the longer i act sane the more insane i become. 060221
...
Ouroboros 88 degrees, anne sexton, suicide thoughts 070218