|
peyton
|
I'll tell you something
I am a wolf but
I like to wear sheep's clothing
I am a bonfire
I am a vampire
I'm waiting for my moment
---
i realized today
that i just might be
what i've fought
she came over today.. again
she seems different
eager
willing
wanting
needing
i can sense it
i smell it on her skin
it seems to coat her words
and pull at me like wispy colored vapors
i can tell i am getting inside her
i can feel her starting to crack
the way she reaches for me
and touches me
and asks me to come by and visit
i find it
repulsive almost
i looked at her
wrapped all around me
and i realized that this is what i must have looked like
when the vampires came for me
it was like an old mirror
and a dusty reflection
and it disgusted me to look at her
I wanted no more part of it. I still don't. She sickens me, almost. I can smell the weakness. The frailty of her soul. How desperately she feels already. I can see her hopes growing deep down.. under the snow. The walls are breaking down.
But not mine.
I did go and see her, where she asked. She tried to kiss me and I pulled back my head. She looked hurt and turned around. With a finger I spun her back towards me.
Mine. That is what you are.
I walked out and thought about Jennifer. I wondered if this is what she saw.. when I was so young and pure and vestal. I wondered if that's how she lived her life. I wonder who twisted her. I wonder how good they were.
I wonder if this is what a mind_fuck is.
I smell her in my clothes. It's like part of her. Something I'm taking, that she'll never get back.
She will never get it back. She will never find the best of me.
I'll tell you something
I am a demon
Some say my biggest weakness
I have my reasons
Call it my defense
Be careful what you're wishing
Be careful when you come over, sweetheart.
Be careful what you're wishing.
Somehow it disgusts me. But then, at the same time I think about Jennifer again..
and
I am grateful.
I am shards of iron mixed with ambrosia.
I am... broken glass.
And she'll never see it coming.
I am a vampire.
I am indeed
a monster.
|
051010
|
