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birdmad
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striving on and on to retain some sense of balance, part of me wants to continuously strive to be some kind of decent human being, part of me remembers how much fun it was to be so terrible in so many ways and wonders why on earth i ever thought to give that up?
was it some genuine desire to be good?
for what? for whom?
was it some intuitive flash that sooner or later, my luck in those matters would run out and that i gone far too long without having any real consequence to face? some say fortune favors the bold, but you always have to wonder for just how long does that hold true?
i live in a slightly rough neighborhood, some sick part of me always hopes that some aspiring street predator mistakes me for an easy mark just so i can have the excuse to do turn the tables and some disproportionate harm
maybe i spent so much time sliding down the ant-lion's lair that i became one myself, hell...it's hard to tell sometimes.
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