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JustOnMonday
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You fell first. You pulled me in and then pulled yourself out and left me there to drown. I couldn't hate you, I still can't. I am holding my breath, but I am face down and drowning. I am lost without you, though I don't think either of us know what that really means yet. Cause we still talk all night about the stars, our hopes, and fucked up jokes. You didn't even realize what you did, did you? Not until it was too late. You told me you wanted to start something and then days later you ask me for advice because you are in love. Fuck love. I asked you how many times you think you've been in love, '2 or 3 times maybe.' There is no maybe. Not in love. The other 2, they didn't give you anything did they? Nothing but heartache and a hang over. I cleaned up your broken heart and teh blood on the floor. But that was only 2, where was the 3 maybe? Could it of been me, before all the rest? You were the only person I have ever loved, all you said was 'sorry.' I don't want your apology or sympathy! I want you! I don't know if I will ever get that. I want to hate you for that, but I can't. I decided that the only way to get you out of my mind is to cut you out of my life. Please, say you hate me, say you wish you never met me. Make me hate you. I want to hate you. Because I feel in love with you boy, but all love does is drown.
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040723
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