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we_fight
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stephshine
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an awful lot.
and i am terrified of temper.
but that first time we made love.
oh.
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070219
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hsg1437
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people Do fight. not that it's necessary. the thing is, often people don't fight -for the wrong reasons. like not trusting their own relationship to say how they really feel. or not knowing how they themselves feel.
u&i both feel strongly about certain things bc we've looked in to them. often people havent even given certain things much thought. & these things sooner or later do come up in life and will be dealt with.
trust me on this. i_very_love_you.
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070219
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stephshine
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we don't know how we feel about certain things, just that we don't feel the way the other does.
i do trust.
but sometimes i trust that you love love, and mistake that for me. but that's ok.
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070220
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fairy
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whats your name? Jesus?
someone gave me an XTC pill once
i can still feel the effects of it.
the city seems like atheme park to me these days.
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070220
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hsg1437
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i cannot speak for someone else, but i know how i feel about issues we discuss. i do love YOU. you're my stephshine. i am fond of love itself, but that's not my interest in you. i am genuinely into YOU, stephgirl. this_is_how_i_feel.
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unhinged
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like old married people. the way my parents fight. over tiny petty little details that don't mean much of anything, but give us some reason to unload on each other no matter how trivial. he thrives off this sort of thing, like my father. he believes it to be banter. it makes me ill. i hate fighting. arguing. disagreeing. conflicting. whatever the fuck he/you call it. i don't like conflict in any of it's guises especially in it's petty ones.
but i am confrontational today. the mental strain of being sick and in pain for almost two weeks has shortened my temper and loosened my tongue. i want to kick him in his teeth. he makes me crazy.
but that is why we have some kind of magical musical chemistry together. it seems to be the way of rock_and_roll ; that the singer and the guitarist hate each other to some degree. we_fight and we are destined for greatness. *shrugs*
ha
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stephshine
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unhinged is right. there is always a thin thread of hate in the closest of relationships i've noticed. why? what is that?
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070307
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?
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is there not, also, a thin thread of love woven into our relationship with a nemesis?
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070307
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(for my part i do not *always* nor even often have this "thin thread of hate" woven into my loves, be they amorous or platonic. however, there are at times peculiar surges of antagonism, which perplex all the same.)
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070307
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stephshine
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perhaps antagonism is better put.
contempt.
fear?
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070307
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hsg1437
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a relationship is the process of going from fear to love. this is communication of truth.
those threads (hate is fear disguised by the ego) are just incomplete communiques.
alll we need do is better communicate. not just thru words.
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gja
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I do hate, just a little bit, those I love. Its self protection. One side of me not wanting to step off the edge.
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gja
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And its true, too, that I do love my nemesis. Because somewhere there is admiration for those that pose a challenge.
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stephshine
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and a little ego never hurt anyone.
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unhinged
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yes, we fight because we are afraid to tell each other the truth.
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070311
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TrueMe
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To know ourselves
To trust ourselves
To believe in ourselves
To love ourselves
Only to repeat the cycle once again
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In_Bloom
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For our place in the pack
Without apologies
For each other
For a few others
For balance
I love a good fight
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080823
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hsg
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ego is the ONLY thing to hurt anyone, ourselves & eo.
when you' re caught in a l_oops, in a petal of a flower and you lose com (with)e whole system thISuffering, disease (even down to the celluliar level miscommunicating with the whole), sorrow.
the ride itself, the bloom in_fun_it is meant to be and to it you all_wISe return. and it is always blooming.
you_are_a_flow_er.
recognize th i s imp l e arNINg technikology, you heal. you begin to recognize the pattern of intelligence itselfloWINg communicating w/the whole system. secrets die and withem badreams. you wake up: no_fight. you are love, duh.
like_whatever, you want to be learning to control your spaceship, is riding the lucIDreaming, is ride_away before you even know it... love_serve_and_remember. that energy to SEW instructions back into the petals of a flower for all who may get lost and earnestly seek instruction...
that_energy_is_pure_awake an incoherent vibration into something more be_you_to_fullest.
i_know_you_are_but_what_am_i ? ikyabwai
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080823
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alison
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I dunno I don't think there is a strain of hate in the closest of relationships, or not always anyway. Ups and downs, fears frustration....but I think the enduring factor is love, unconditional something to fall back on....I know folks who fight and it doesn't bother them, it may even stimulate them or they find it comfortable...personally I don't groove that way I flinch at fighting it doesn't excite me or engage me....discussing things out hardcore, I'm all down with that...for me it's always possible and I've seen it done with an underlying thread of love and humour...the ability to laugh with compassion, in the end, is the sustaining force in any confrontation or communication in general
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080823
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hsg
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"there is always a thin thread of hate in the closest of relationships i've noticed. why? what is that? "
hate_is_fear there are no exceptions to this. hating on something is easier for the ego to admIThan fear.
to answer your question, your closest relationships are the ones where you trust someonenough to begin to let your own deepest insecuritiesurface. they do this as toxins leave a system. there are proper ways to deal withese things so no more hurt comes about from them. and there are ways which yet still bring about more fear.
the fiercest arguments border on us facing our true selves which is the scariesthing we ca n ever do.. until we'readying mORe accurately until we let go of ego_chains
and choose Love oveR fear.
"unt i l earn to love myself i continue to deeply hurt people as soon as they become clos e nough to me."
-thIStorylINeverylationship thEGOes onto having from generation to generation unfortunately. but thIS up to us " as_is " forgiveness... because you're the only one who's ever hated you either
afraid to recognize yourselfor (Love or) didn'think you wereThy.
th (*at *in *read) of hate is not the closest of relationships but the closest you've come to begin to love yourself... and that scares you even though you are a good person and you cannot hide from that forever nor hide behind a false mask telling yourself you believe you're a good person even though it's the lasthing you've been willing to accept.
a the nd of (t i'm e) very thing all of a sudden makesense. your mind is no longer shattered. you find yourself in won peace. you are sane forever more. the unafraid do not fight because they understand they cannot lose. better yet, love flows, it'soul good.
are you afraid (in order) to (be at) peace? because that's a fate you cannot win. because it hurts. and hurt cannot last. not forever. and eternity minus one single moment falls apart so quickly in your mind it's as if it never happened because your together mind is in_fun_it volume compared to your shattered mind... nightmares have no place here.
there is no fight without fear. the moment you fight, you loose.
re memb our meant all peace is if iTo get here is mean to be.
be nice. and there is no fight. there is clar i ty pun derstanding... get it?
:-) (-:
Chrysalis Kiss
CK bee!
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080823
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In_Bloom
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Fight, yes
I'd rather weave though
*got it*
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080824
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