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suppurate
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any consternation is duly noted and roundly ignore
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the rage is like a spider-bite, i don't deny its toxicity, i just don't fuckin care anymore
maybe this bilious hatred suits me better than the years of depressive moping
who knows?
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220125
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dafremen
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Sounds like a bad menu. Too bad the propagandists handed you an easy enemy before you suffered loss. Now you're stuck in their bullshit reality, pouring your hatred and aching in the wrong direction. Exactly what they wanted, and the opposite of what is needed to end the dying and division.
If I were here to convince you, I'd say more. But everyone grieves in their own way. Some need to lash out at the wrong people. I get it. Lash away.
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220126
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just fucking save it
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Oh save your jesus christ pose for anyone who hasn't witnessed your unfettered ability to bloviate for some 20 years now
you're no more the beleaguered misunderstood prophet you cast yourself to be than i am a fucking brass plated pinecone
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220126
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Doar
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I sense psychosis.
How can I make money off of this?
.
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220126
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dafremen
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You already made money FOR it, my friend. The system is psychotic.
Me? Told you: "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" Why not? It's as sane as anything the plugged in are suggesting, and twice as fun to riff off of the energy that hits me. Will I be angry? Will I be laughing? You tell me. Go ahead. You're in charge.
Psychosis? Ok. In eagles_and_wolves psychosis predicted that "terrorist" would become an excuse for subverting people's rights..before they passed the Patriot Act. I'm not sure why we're living in exactly that situation.
Seemed obvious to my psychotic ass at the time and still to the present day. Sure..it sucked watching everyone fall for it, since I constantly live with the consequences of people not taking good advice. WTF not?
Not SURE why our leaders, with billions..and the best minds at their disposal couldn't see that a special "terrorist" category was a bad idea. Maybe it was convenient for them not to see it. Or maybe you're right. Maybe psychosis knows psychosis.
It might be that abusive childhood of mine that's so trite or unforgiveable to so many, even though you're fortunately unacquainted. Isaac Newton says you haven't studied the matter enough so your opinion on the subject doesn't matter. I concur. So here:
Maybe being surrounded by abusive psychotics, then afterward sent by the state on a whirlwind tour of a score of middle class homes, gives one some insight into the birthplace of our society's psychosis. I saw the whole thing. It was 85% grotesque.
Mainstream, materialist society is psychotic. Jealous, petty, deathly afraid of not having enough control to get others to do for them what they can't do themselves. So afraid that they guard their money carefully, lest they be helpless in a world that mostly can't stand their clueless, needy only having money and compliments to offer ass.
Everyone in the "attaining class" wants their ROI. Everyone is out to take what's theirs. For most of those with any amount of wealth, no one can be trusted: in their lives, in their businesses. More cameras. More security. More laws. Always to corral those around them in..those who don't have. Nothing psychotic about supporting that for decades. Obviously you're all sane af.
And for them, it's not the consequences of raping their own people until they are dead broke that's destroying society and its future. Nooo. It's the rise of crime! (Oooo straw man to blame instead of themselves)
It's said that 'the thief has the thickest bars on his windows'..just as the wealthy have woven the law like a shield around themselves..fearing retribution for all of the wrongs they have done to their fellow man.
It's because they've some reason to distrust everyone. And it's made them psychotic af. I just may know a thing about psychosis after all. So as the expert, let me tell you this:
Living with a bunch of psychotic lying assholes for as long as you folks have from cradle to now and calling it normal, or successful or whatever words you use for this ENORMOUS human failure that strokes the compliant and their masters..THAT is psychotic.
Our children will be corpses or slaves while you shuffle around in your cargo shorts, track pants and flip flops..or go make the rich some more money like an obedient slave.
This, with full knowledge of the corrupt who lead us, but still playing life like a lark or as a list of chores done 8 hours a day to secure a rich man's investment. That's how we get our allowance from big daddy money.
And THIS because folks bought the lie that infantilised them. That's delusional. Trusting corrupt strangers because they said to..that's the sort of thing dads protect their teenage daughters from. Shame on you for calling yourselves adults or judging anyone else's mental illness.
Finally, more to the point and even more insane, is that you literally think you're not an accomplice to this madness. How much empathy do you deserve for yelling at people you don't know..the rhetoric you were told by a corrupt system? Get some remorse and come back around. You tried to subject OUR people to your psychosis too. Should've dropped out when you had the chance.
see also: clan
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220126
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offended
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how dare you! i would never wear cargo pants.
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220130
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just another plague rat
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first off, i thought you might like to know that your writing is really thought-provoking. you have so much to say and so much to teach us. have you thought about writing a book? (what a stupid question–of course you have!) i wouldn’t buy it, but i’d certainly leaf through it. second, if you don’t mind hearing more of my thoughts, i have to admit that i connect with your writing on a personal level. it’s eerie... you remind me a lot of my dad. (yikes, sorry if that’s a touchy subject for you, considering your difficult past!) he’s a pretty intelligent guy, maybe even as smart as you are, and he has a lot of strong opinions. if you don’t agree with him, in his eyes you’re obviously a moron who doesn’t know how to think for themselves. as much as i hate to admit it, he’s probably right.
overall i feel lucky to have such brilliant people in my life, though the process of becoming more enlightened and evolved can be painful. but it’s so worth it, right? anyway i think some of his behavior comes from having such a difficult childhood, so i give him the benefit of the doubt and excuse all of it no matter how condescending and monotonous… it’s not his fault! he’s a victim. i’m sure you can relate to that. you have to have compassion for people, right? especially when they’re clearly adrift and need some guidance.
speaking of family, you also remind me a lot of myself when i was younger. i always had to have the last word–i thought i knew everything! but that’s how teenagers are, ya know? my parents would get so pissed off… like ”why do you always have to have the last word?!?!” it’s interesting to look back on (and don’t worry, i won’t try to psychoanalyze you–i’m just sharing my opinions based on my own limited life experience). it never felt as good as i thought it would. always being right, that is. instead of being satisfying it was more like this impotent kind of rage, like pissing into the wind. luckily i grew out of it, though, and it’s interesting how people seem to enjoy being around me more since i’m not always insisting that i know better than everyone else. it kind of sucks though because i AM right, i’m just too polite to correct people all the time. damn those social norms.
sorry for the novel! i just wanted to make sure you feel seen.
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220130
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daf
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First off, I'm pretty jazzed to hear about the transformations in your life! That's great for you AND the world. Here's your response novel:
I'm so happy to hear that your dad has someone in his life that is willing to see past the cover to his book. (That's a saying for a reason, you know. Let folks ignore it at their loss or their peril in this world.)
So, good for you, that's a victory.
People like you are very important in the lives of those who've suffered childhood abuse. No doubt as the mainstream world became more traumatized in its own childhood, your dearly won abilities were (and will continue to be) in high demand.
Again, good for you..healer. My girl's a healer too. We've done a pretty good job of complementing each other. I'm a fighter she can always count on who needs healing. She's a healer who understands those who struggle with the ghosts of their childhood fight as they grew into their abilities..perhaps that also might remind you of your dad.
The other really good news, is that you've found the sort of friendship and connection that you need to keep your healing heart healthy, happy, protected and feeling loved. Some of us are more comfortable feeling out our relationships VERY carefully and settling on folks who seem to be "our kind of people."
I've got attachment disorder. I'm in no big hurry to be anyone's friend just to join a back-massaging session. I'd just end up with the sorest hands AND the sorest back.
Coincidentally, I posted something about the nature of popularity and my desire for it on Zuckerboard a couple of days back. I'll cut and paste it into popularity if you happen to see it on the shelf and have a second to thumb through. If not, here's a summary:
My closest friends are of 15, 30 and now going on 5 years. I have some neighbors I hang out with here and there, just to keep my part of a tight-knit community.
My life of tending to other people's needs, (including and especially their ego needs) started when I was about 3, as an autistic kid forced to defend my siblings from abuse by fighting back against our abusers.
After the state got involved, I was subsequently thrown into a ton of foster homes and orphanages, when no one could diagnose me as autistic, because I was too outgoing by the time they got to me, having fought off my step grandfather to protect my sister from further sexual abuse, constantly..for 4 years.
So I'm 50 years into feeling everyone's energy all around me..AND a LOT of it is pretty mean, let me tell you (and karma's a bitch.) And now I have this foundation psychology that tells me where the mean people and the takers are. Where the abusers are..hiding back behind their lies and their passive aggressive attempts at manipulating people and situations. Ugh..(I won't lie to you..it's satisfying to dish it back..if not particularly evolved, for a hunk of stardust that knows better.)
And YES, at first, in my younger days I had many wonderful things I dreamed of that involved LOTS of people gathered together. But for the reasons mentioned above (and shortly to be blathed under popularity), the universe has shown me that my path lies in a different direction. I'm happy with that.
We're currently coordinating events for a non-profit and that gives me plenty of outlet for my desire to see lots of people helped and happy, without it all being on MY back.
Meanwhile, my friends show me their appreciation and their annoyance with me in turns, but their energy and their loyalty and their love never changes..and I can feel that. And that's the sort of stability I need in my life.
What I don't need to get too close to, are a bunch of strangers that I've known for years, who might turn on me at any moment.
And frankly, after 50 years of putting up with this manipulative ego-driven shit that most folks take for granted, (because they were slowly introduced to it by loved ones) I deserve better and so insist on it.
Glad you know how to read carefully and especially between the lines. Again, good for you.
Thanks for taking the time to check out this old book and share your thoughts about it. Hope you're enjoying the netertainment. There's a cast of characters that I lived out just to please people in my life when I was younger. And now, I get to be a big fat clown whenever I want to and no one seems to believe it.
: )
Guess we can get our shtick down TOO good.
Be well.
see also: popularity look_at_him_go
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220131
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dafremen
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see also: free_gold_bricks
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220131
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just lurking
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so much to catch up on.
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220203
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dafremen
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Anonymous: *ROAR* You people are selfish and wrong.
Dafremen: *ROAR* You people are clueless, pushy and wrong.
Birdmad (removing his cloak of anonymous invisibility):*ROAR* It's YOU dafremen! Fuck you and your bad energy. You've been sending my shitty, judgemental energy back at me for decades! How DARE YOU, you selfish, self-centered TWAT muscle! Why don't you just behave as I WANT you to, go away, or be more like ME?! Grrrr!
Dafremen: *ROAR* Yes that is correct and no thank you. Stop sending shit energy out into the ethers if you don't want it back. Or adult up and take your consequences..fucking energy litter bug.
Birdmad: *ROAR* It is not SO! YOU start the shit you muckraking shit grinder!
Dafremen: Well, I think you know what my next move is. *ROAR* Who blathed first?
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220204
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dafremen
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And that goes for you too Doar.
I have no problem kicking anonymous judgmental shitbags in the teeth.
Why would I?
Walk into a place you're known with a disguise on and start SCREAMING your rage at the world.
See how fast they kick your ass out of there, or straight up kick your ass.
If you aren't ready for those consequences before you lash out with you energy, then someone failed you in the life skills department. I was raised by nobody.
Anyhow, anonymous folks spewing shit energy have always gotten what they had coming around here.
You're always free to act like clued human beings and identify yourself, before you come in blasting.
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220204
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ssdd
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people do stupid things all of the time.
Having a heart isn't easy.
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220224
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ego hum
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can't be said too much
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220225
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