blather
three_more_seconds
bijou please come over.


oh to feel your face to feel your skin. my eyes are closed and god, you are the fucking atmosphere you are the fucking water you are the fire and the dirt


and i can't understand anything else. you are the only language i can speak

and the only fucking music i can hear. you are the only time the phone rings, you are the only two legs i have to stand on in the morning when i try to get out of my bed.



please let me touch you. please let me read you.

don't worry, this won't hurt you a bit.
010920
...
little fury bug ...and then I'll let you go...just let me hear your voice for a while longer...then you can say goodnight and hang up the phone...just linger for a few more seconds. i wish this dream would last longer. 020617
...
Ariadani and then it all explodes

gone_without_a_trace
020617
...
reitoei one. ready.

this is the end. What has my life meant to me, to others, to the "ultimate result"? Nothing. The past was filled with joy and depression. hate and love. fear and curiousity. the times once had, the good the bad the things ive done are nothing now,they are past. everything is behind this concrete wall pressing coldly into my back.

two. aim.

the past is nothing. this is now, this is real. this moment is all i know. the rugged outlines of bullet hole near the level of my waist, something for my bound hands to mindlessly automatically explore. the future is unknown to all. just as the expressions of the men beyond my blindfold are forbidden to me. the breeze, the chill of the wall, lessened by the sun creeping higher. sensation is that is left and all that will ever be.

three. fire

blood. body crumples. death. 7 soldiers march. they are the moment.
020617