blather
no_use
stork daddy he always admired people who stuck to their guns. there were some people who would never go back to a restaurant that didn't meet their expectations once. or would never again go to their favorite bar if the friend who made that bar matter died or left town or whatever. he wasn't like that...he'd get lazy and wear the ring he was supposed to keep in a little box on a shelf somewhere, or he'd have to have that restuarant's cheesecake. he deeply resented his inability to unequivocably value something forever. he seemed unable to hold any taboo, any stance, for the amount of time it took to be honorable: a lifetime. 040217
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:_) there's no use in torturing myself. but i do it anyway. i believe there might be some purpose that i hold on to it. to keep it safe. because there is no right or wrong answers. giving in to what i want is still torture. suffering is my way of life. 040217