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silentbob
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on the one hand, i begged myself to not feel the same way anymore, begged myself not to hurt, begged myself to get over it, it would never happen, i told myself. especially how obsessive i was getting, how strong i was coming on. and how bad that is.
on the other hand, i thought for a moment i had figured out everything i wanted, like i had finally found it.
but it just turned out to be one of my fifteen minute crushes that goes away.
it was seriously so bad yesterday.
and now its gone, and before i would have loved it, but now i want it back. because its...fun to dwell.
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040125
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