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andrea
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I think my mom is falling off the edge.
Slowly-so we all don’t point and gasp-
but falling nonetheless. No job, no
car, and not dealing with the fact that
you’re gone. Of course, I’m not sure
how I’m dealing with it, either, so I
guess I shouldn’t criticize.
Being home is driving me crazy. I’m
so used to being on my own. It’s
almost like I’ve outgrown this place.
I feel like I have to watch everything I say or do so I don’t upset anyone.
But, my friends understand me. Think
it’s because we’re all rearranging,
without knowing exactly what it is we
are all molding ourselves to be. We just find happiness in seeing changes in one another.
I just wish you were here to see me now. How much I’ve changed inside and out. To listen to me and give me your opinion. But, mostly, to hug me and tell me that everything is going to be all right, okay.
And dammit, despite the way I feel, I can’t cry…I just can let myself cry.
I can’t let go.
copyright 2000
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000507
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